As slut told

If you're asking "What is slut shaming? September 9, Rebecca Sedwick , 12, jumped to her death after being tormented relentlessly about how far she'd gone with a boy she had dated. December 9, Jessica Laney , 16, hung herself after being called a slut and whore online. October 24, Felicia Garcia , 15, threw herself in front of a speeding train after rumors spread about her having sex with members of the school's football team. October 10, Amanda Todd , 15, hung herself after being blackmailed and called a slut over revealing photos an adult had pressured her to take years before. The list could go on and on, but it's frankly too depressing for me to continue.

Slut-shaming is the practice of criticizing people, especially women and girls, who are perceived to violate expectations of behavior and appearance regarding issues related to sexuality. Examples of slut-shaming include being criticized or punished for violating dress code policies by dressing in perceived sexually provocative ways, requesting access to birth control , [5] [6] [7] having premarital , casual , or promiscuous sex, engaging in prostitution , [8] [9] or when being victim blamed for being raped or otherwise sexually assaulted. Slut-shaming involves criticizing women for their transgression of accepted codes of sexual conduct, [12] i. Slut-shaming is used by men and women. This is done by stating the crime was caused either in part or in full by the woman wearing revealing clothing or acting in a sexually provocative manner, before refusing consent to sex, [10] thereby absolving the perpetrator of guilt. Sexually lenient individuals can be at risk of social isolation.

The first step to changing our culture is to change our own behavior. Deciding to stop slut shaming means deciding to stop blaming another woman — any other woman — for our personal fears and insecurities regarding our bodies and sex. That requires taking a critical look at those personal fears and insecurities, which is an uncomfortable thing for most people to do. The beliefs we take for granted are the hardest ones to question. But as we get better at recognizing and rejecting the slut shaming that goes on in our minds, we also get better at avoiding slut shaming in our words and actions.

What I wish I could have told them then, and what I wish I could tell them now, was just how dangerous and damaging that label turned out to be. When I arrived for the first day of middle school, still pining for a romance that could never be, I told my friends in the cafeteria about our magical kiss. Word got around and somehow one fairly chaste kiss turned into making out. Boys openly groped me in our school hallways.