Recognizing and Managing Erotic and Eroticized Transferences
Erotic transference: a brief review
In reality, what some clients are experiencing is a potentially harmful side effect of psychotherapy and one that should be taken far more seriously by the profession. In the initial stages of therapy, such transferences are usually idealising, because clients tend to project onto their therapists the qualities they longed for from their early carers, and so experience them in a particularly positive way. However, for a small but significant number of people, the experience is very different: the idealisation intensifies rather than fades, and the client becomes increasingly consumed with and dependent on thoughts about the therapist. I was uneasy, but in a childlike way also excited by being so special to a person such as him. I was very confused, experiencing feelings that I had not felt before. I can only describe it as like being caught up in an emotional earthquake.
Falling In Love with the Therapist: Erotic Transference and Psychotherapy
Erotic transference at first feels like falling in love and has a euphoric quality, but my experience is that it has the potential to be quite emotionally damaging and lingering. For me, after nearly two years, there is still a deep longing, restlessness, and melancholy that will not subside. It's described as torturous by some of the patients on this website and I think that pretty much sums it up. Also, it seems there are different forms of transference, and my experience is with the most serious — eroticized transference. But I have to say, with all due respect, that many therapists appear to be clueless and have no idea how to deal with this or understand what the patient is going through
All therapists at some point struggle with sexual and loving feelings in therapy relationships. Due to the absence of core curriculum on the resultant treatment issues, the psychotherapy supervisor or consultant may be the primary clinical teacher around these complex clinical situations. A safe, shame-free, trust-worthy supervisory relationship provides the arena for open dialogue, self-revelation, and deep clinical exploration of these issues. Lack of specialized training leaves clinicians vulnerable to misunderstanding or mishandling sexually charged clinical situations. Events have been integrated to avoid problems of confidentiality.