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The story I'm about to tell you is true. You will not believe it. Nevertheless, the events are accurate and factual. I swear. There is most likely not a more miserable time in your life as 9th grade. You're freshly out of junior high, but so what.

Grantland, the sports and culture outlet founded by Bill Simmons in , has suspended publication indefinitely, according to an ESPN press release issued on Friday afternoon:. Well, probably the same thing you do when you surf the computer all day: look at porn. A note to our readers: In the process of assigning this post, we were informed that its author, historian Greg Grandin, was having his own Kissinger biography reviewed by the New York Times Book Review. We should have inquired with Grandin as to the timing of the review of his book and reported that fact in the post, and we apologize for failing to do so.

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I crawled out of bed, still wearing my Cracker Barrel uniform from the night before and managed to make my way over to the coffee machine. I grabbed my pumpkin spiced coffee, walked over to the couch, and opened his laptop. It was like the television was somehow warning me. My whole body went numb. My thoughts began to race.